Yes Will Come – Keep Asking For What You Want

Are you prepared to persist after hearing “no” to a deeply personal question? What about after hearing “no” twice? OK, how about hearing “no” to the same question five times?

If you are prepared to persist in the face of this opposition, then I believe one of three things is true about you: 

1. You don’t need to read further because nothing I’m about to say will help you; you already get it.
2. You are being unrealistically optimistic while having no experience with deeply felt emotional rejection pertaining to your dreams; if you keep reading you will likely get something useful.
3. You are in touch with the experience of your dream meeting someone else’s reality, and however uncomfortable, you know your dreams require persistence to move past “no” to get to “yes”; this article can be used as fuel for your journey.

 If you are still reading, welcome to the doorway leading to the land of the thick-skinned winners. Ok, whatever with all of that! This is laid out in three parts; The Foundation, The Method and The Resolve.

The Foundation:

The Two Thirds Theory

People that we interact with tend to fall into one of three categories with respect to how they perceive and react to you.

The First Third

Even on your best day, when your swagger is bangin at 100% and everything about you is hot on full blast, there will still be those who don’t feel you. You can’t positively affect everyone.

This has nothing to do with you; some people are just predisposed to respond more favorably to a person with different traits; someone who is taller, has darker (or lighter) skin, or has more muscles, etc. These will be the people in your life that tell you that you don’t have what it takes or that “you can’t” live your dream.

And, at the other end of the spectrum . . .

The Second Third

On your worst day, when you shouldn’t have gotten out of bed or may not feel very good about yourself or what you’re doing in life, there will be those who see you as the hottest or most necessary person in sight.

In their eyes, you can do no wrong. Again, this is not about you; these people are predisposed to respond favorably to someone like you because of whatever you represent, how you create, or talk, or walk, etc. These are the people that love everything you do no matter what.

And, at the center of it all . . .

The Final Third

The third group is made up of individuals who will really experience you and will appreciate the true uniqueness that shows up in whatever you do, whether it be your artistry, your essence or your true swagger. These people respond because they feel you; they can’t not appreciate you and what you have to offer. These are the people that love what you do because of who you really are, not because of what you do.

What does this all mean? Trust your own ideas and do what you believe in and not rely on the approval of others to pursue your dream. No means no for them, not for you. It’s estimated that there are over 7 billion people on the planet. Two thirds of them will respond favorably to you and your music if you would only give them the chance. God has blessed you with a gift, but it’s up to you to develop and present it to the world.

The Method:

Do your best work!

Whether its lyrics, a complete song, or some other form of creative endeavor, do your best work now. When you bring your all to the creative process then it truly is the best work you can do right now.

My twelfth album is better than my first because of many factors; I had better equipment at my disposal, I had a better understanding of production techniques, greater confidence in my arranging skills, more proficiency in my musicianship and a fluid command of the studio environment to be more creative and less technical during studio sessions. I do my best work now!

Know that doing your best work now gives you two amazingly important things:

1. You get something finished that is presentable to others which represents your current best work.
2. You gain knowledge and experience through doing, which adds value to the next piece of work you complete.

 The Resolve:

Finding the “yes”!

So, through the foundational belief that you can’t fail because:

1. Success in getting to “yes” is in the numbers, not in how good you think you are or even how good you actually are, because two thirds of 7 billion people want to say “yes” to you; they just need to know you exist and know what you have to offer.
2. Your best work now is good enough to get a “yes” now. Just reference all of the songs and artists you think suck; things on radio and TV which cause you to ask “how in the hell . . .?” They all found at least one “yes” through persisting past “no”.

Having The Foundation and The Method leaves only this: The Resolve. Present what you’ve got, ask for what you want!

I am still amazed by people who won’t ask for what they want. I’ve been asking Russell Simmons lately to connect me with a few people. He hasn’t responded yet and I’m not bothered by his lack of response, but I’m going to keep asking. I don’t even know him yet, but I will. In the meantime, I will contact his friends, and friends of friends through MySpace, Twitter and Global Grind. Oh yes, in the new industry, with tenacity you can get to anyone!

He will say yes to my request one day, but until then, I keep it moving. I’m asking for lots of “yeses”, and not from just one individual in one area; you may want to consider doing the same. (I was going to say “should”, but I hate that word.)

As a result of the question asking, a few things have happened; some people who would never have known me are now asking me questions about what I do and are checking to see who I am. Some are buying beats or talking about upcoming projects they want me to work on. I want $1.5 million to produce the next album for . . . Think I ain’t asking? Really?!? Believe it!

Understand and be prepared to hear “no” often. “No, I don’t want your song.” “No, I don’t like you.” “No, you’re not what we are looking for.” “No, you don’t have enough experience.” “No, and stop asking!” The best, brightest and most successful have heard it and didn’t let it stop them from seeking “yes” instead.

Know this: without any arrogance, understand that your artistry is desired by many and will be paid for handsomely at the right time. Your mission is to make it available and to find those who desire to say “yes” to you. “No” can only stop those who don’t believe that the “yes” can be found.

Or, as said differently by Dr. Wayne Dyer, “if you believe you can or you believe you can’t, you’re right about that!”

If you don’t believe, stop now! Finding “yes” is not about if, it’s about when!

Yes will come; keep asking for what you want!